Metanoia

One of those days. To each and every one of us ‘those’ holds a different meaning…however, when this phrase is uttered we somehow all understand and empathize. Generally, no details are even needed. We can pull from the bushel of our ‘those days’ and just nod . I feel ya buddy. I’ve had those too.   Friday was one of those days. Sometimes I wonder how often when you argue with your spouse, how much of your genuine irritation is directly aimed and your significant other or if a good portion of it is projected. Today I would have to humbly admit that most of my annoyance with Sully was really at myself… and his uncanny ability to point that out to me in a way that causes the little lightbulb dangling above my oblivious head to illuminate. I hate it when that happens. When you feel all justified and you are prancing around on your regal high horse and some peasant has the nerve to knock you off! Then when you know you’re wrong instead of just raising the white flag of peace yo...

I feel like I need to lead into this with a disclaimer of sorts. I am a firm believer that if one goes traveling into the wilds of Alaska (and in some cases the concrete jungles of Los Anchorage) one should always have a firearm. I personally like to carry my .357 while hiking, and along with that you can often find me toting an airhorn. I usually give the airhorn to one of my kids, so that if the noise doesn't deter an angry bear, I can be ready with some lead pursuasion. Teamwork. This morning as I was getting the farm chores wrapped up and getting ready to load Kimber up in the Ranger for our daily walk, I neglected to grab my pistola. I always have an airhorn in the glovebox of my ranger, but it is only part two of my two part self protection system. Part one being my loaded gun. I didn't sweat it when I parked the Ranger and realized I had ambled off without part one of two. I shoved the airhorn in my pocket and we went on our way. A good two miles into our walk...

I recently watched an episode of North Woods Law. There was a woman who hiked the Appalachian Trail and had disappeared. Her husband, authorities, and volunteers searched for weeks, following many promising leads...but ultimately they came up empty handed. It was years later they learned that she had walked off the trail to use the restroom and got turned around. She decided to stop after wandering aimlessly for miles and hoped that help would come. She set up camp and tried to survive on what little rations she had. She was found deceased in her sleeping bag, sadly just mere miles from a logging road that led to civilization.  Even though you know the outcome, you still find yourself desperate for a better ending. I have had my share of scares, wandering off the beaten path into the woods. One time in particular I was with my parents moose hunting, the fog set in making it hard to determine what direction you were headed. The Alaska landscape didn't help either, everything...

I'm ninety days into this. I haven't blogged everyday as I had hoped, but lets face it...more often than not I don't have enough material to keep anyone interested on a daily basis. I have learned a lot about myself in the last ninety days. This morning I found myself mired in discontentment in my progress. Although I am no where near where I was when I started, I am still not nearly as far as I had hoped by this time. And while I was stewing on my perceived failures I kept coming back to a lesson my very wise husband had given me on the drywall of the dive shop he owned. We were living in Hawaii. I had asked him to explain what 'The Bends' was. So many divers shuffling in and out of the dive shop refilling their oxygen tanks and that term often fell from their lips in a somber tone. I didn't know that day that I would later marry Sully. I didn't know that I would stash that conversation away or that it would be such a profound epiphany in relating to m...

A mouse's tale.  I always have good intentions and the day slips away from me and the housework piles up. For being a housekeeper by profession you would think my house would be CLEAN. Yesterday morning I woke up late and moseyed down to the couch and turned on the TV. First step into being unproductive let me tell you. I knew I had family coming over in the evening for a BBQ, but I had plenty of time to clean the house and pick up the yard. The TV is strange, because there can be NOTHING on and yet you still get sucked in for hours. It's best to never turn it on if you have any aspirations of accomplishing things. I felt zero motivation, and I started to negotiate in my mind a way to clean only what had to be done for the get together vs. doing what I should do. Sully called and we were chatting when I heard the horrifying sound of claws scratching on the wall behind the couch. My biggest fears were confirmed when both my cats showed up to investigate. It was a mouse. I...

The past seventeen days I was given ample opportunity to extend Grace, to choose joy in the face of stress, and patience...was I ever given the opportunity to practice patience. We got a dog. Those of you who know me, know that is something I have been trying to avoid since Sully and I got married. I hate admitting that too, cause I'm met with such stink eye when I utter the words..."I don't love dogs" Truth be told I love other peoples dogs, because they don't live in my space. I can pet them, think they are cute, and then when I go home no harm, no foul. I made it twelve years. Twelve glorious years. We now have a dog.  I went over two full weeks without a drop of Diet Poison, was on a roll, and then Fred Meyers, Safeway, & Three Bears ran out of my only two favorite Zevia drinks...my lifelines when the cravings came a calling. Seriously stores, there is obviously a market for them, why are there only a select few on the shelves?! They are harder to...

Has God ever hand picked your reading material? I feel spoiled, and loved, and completely in awe all at once. In March I was struggling...I was absolutely drowning in my grief. My aunt followed the prompting of the Holy Spirit and mailed me the book 'One Thousand Gifts' by Ann Voskamp, which completely turned everything around. It was exactly what I needed. The other day while retrieving my mail I found a package from one of my mom's dear friends from our time back in Colorado. She too had felt lead to send me a book, and I imagine this book will have a similar effect, how could it not? You've got mail from your Heavenly Father. Amazing. I am so grateful both of these beautiful souls were willing vessels for God to work in my life. It really makes me think about how often I ignore the promptings, or get to busy to hear them. How many opportunities am I missing to do God's work and be the blessing for others? In the book 'One Thousand Gifts' Ann points o...